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‘Be you, be true, be ‘Roo:’ Bonnaroo speed dating event provides community for queer people

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Featured Photo by Alyssa Williams

Story by Alyssa Williams

Love flew through the air during the QueerRoo Speed Dating & Friending event, a gathering for queer people from across the nation looking to make new friends or find a “Bonnaboo,” at Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival.

Davis Mendoza Darusman started the event last year after the InteROOlactic Spacelab pitching competition, where he highlighted the need for more queer-inclusive spaces at Bonnaroo. He based it on his idea for a queer-based speed dating show.

“People want to meet each other in a safe and welcoming environment, and that’s what this event is about,” Mendoza Darusman said.

The speed dating event operated like musical chairs. Half of the participants stood up and circled an on-site venue that typically hosts weddings, called the House of MatROOmony, while the other half remained seated. When the music stops – or, in this case, the acapella karaoke provided by participants – the members find someone near them to talk to for eight minutes. 

David Mendoza Darusman greets the participants of the QueerRoo Speed Dating & Friending gather for a group photo at Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival in Manchester, Tennessee, on June 15, 2024. (Photo by Alyssa Williams)

Each member wore a name tag with pronouns and color-coded, heart-shaped stickers to indicate what they were looking for from the event. A white heart indicated that the person searched for friends, while a red heart indicated a person wanted to find someone of any gender to date. 

“This event is about people bringing their authentic selves,” Mendoza Darusman said. “They might not be comfortable doing so wherever they call home, but this is a second home.”

Mendoza Darusman thought the location was ironic. If someone met their forever partner at the event, they might come back to the barn to get married.

Kodi Mae McDearmont from Birmingham, Alabama, who uses they/she pronouns, hoped to find love at the speed dating event. This year, they brought their situationship to Bonnaroo. McDearmont hopes to ditch him for someone else who may make the festival enjoyable. 

“I’ve been talking to a lot of people about how rude he’s been and the things he’s said,” McDearmont said. “All of them have told me, ‘Go find someone else, girl.’ I’m trying to not hang out with that guy anymore. I also just got dumped.”

Kodi Mae McDearmont poses with the new friend that gave her a necklace after meeting at QueerRoo Speed Dating & Friending at the Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival in Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival in Manchester, Tennessee, on June 15, 2024. (Photo by Alyssa Williams)

Unfortunately, McDearmont did not find the love they were looking for. But still, they enjoyed the event. 

“A lot of the people I met were only looking for friends,” McDearmont said, donning a new perler bead necklace of the Bonnaroo logo in pansexual colors. “I was looking for love. I met a friend who gave me this cool necklace, and we’re going to the pride parade later.”

Unlike McDearmont, Roz Thompson looked for a meaningful connection that he could spend the rest of the weekend with — whether that was a partner or a friend. He lives in Tampa, Florida, a state with legislators who continue to push anti-LGBTQ+ legislation.

“I think that Bonnaroo is the one place in the South that you can come as you are and be as free as you want to be,” Thompson said. “You don’t have to be ashamed of who you are, and that’s really valuable.”

Riss Halbert shared a similar sentiment, coming to the event with her friend Jessie Frierson and camp neighbor Montana Watson. Halbert and Frierson traveled from Ohio, while Watson trekked to The Farm from Indiana. Watson bought her festival tickets before the lineup came out.

Jessie Frierson (left), Riss Halbert (middle), and Montana Watson (right), discuss their plans for the rest of the day at Bonnaroo Music & Arts Festival in Manchester, Tennessee, on June 15, 2024. (Photo by Alyssa Williams)

The three came to the event to make more queer friends, as they found that community at QueerRoo Speed Dating & Friending. Watson described Bonnaroo as her home, her family.

“I think Bonnaroo creates a safe space for all types of people,” Halbert said. “Everyone looks out for each other, and it’s such a good vibe. We’re here to support you and keep you safe, but be you.”

“Be you, be true, be ‘Roo,” Frierson added with a laugh. 

Alyssa Williams is the Managing Editor for MTSU Sidelines

To contact the Lifestyles Editor, email lifestyles@mtsusidelines.com.

For more news, visit www.mtsusidelines.com, or follow us on Instagram at MTSUSidelines or on X at @MTSUSidelines. Also, sign up for our weekly newsletter here.

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